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Jul. 2nd, 2012 02:02 pmI was an over-emotional kid. Now I'm an over-emotional adult. (I tried to reclaim a better, less-judgmental word to describe this, but, yeah. Oh well. On that particular count, it's just, let me twist the knife into my heart, just a little more.) I know there are pros to the cons. I know. I know.
Oh, and ridiculous despair just swung into a blip of fleeting elation because I watched quails walk by. It's okay if you laugh. I do.
Hi.
Who am I, and how did I get this way. Or, who cares, it doesn't matter how I got this way (~fascinating though it is to dig into), but how can I better go about life. And actually, who cares, this is all rhetorical, I'm just writing because it helps, and I already know what I need to do, and that is to be absolutely diligent about my thoughts, until it finally starts coming naturally again for me to not jump to fears first.
And the thought that I feel permanently broken is fear, so fuck that noise.
*yell*
Edited to add, because it's worth writing down: To clarify, nearly everything is good, life is extremely good, and I'm actually really grateful for all of it. Grace & gratefulness are the reality here.
Oh, and ridiculous despair just swung into a blip of fleeting elation because I watched quails walk by. It's okay if you laugh. I do.
Hi.
Who am I, and how did I get this way. Or, who cares, it doesn't matter how I got this way (~fascinating though it is to dig into), but how can I better go about life. And actually, who cares, this is all rhetorical, I'm just writing because it helps, and I already know what I need to do, and that is to be absolutely diligent about my thoughts, until it finally starts coming naturally again for me to not jump to fears first.
And the thought that I feel permanently broken is fear, so fuck that noise.
*yell*
Edited to add, because it's worth writing down: To clarify, nearly everything is good, life is extremely good, and I'm actually really grateful for all of it. Grace & gratefulness are the reality here.
